My submissive Nomicon has been blogging about DomCon in LA and his experiences there. And one of his posts about forms of address and behavior made me think...

I do think that Nomicon is a very natural submissive. He almost always trusts that what I want for him is a good thing. And actually even when that might not be true, and I am being selfish and willful, he happily tries to comply with my vagaries.

But perhaps I am too “sweet”? While at DomCon I met a woman at one of the events (I think the first night social and then at the DDI photo shoot) – Kayla Crowe - who subsequently tweeted that she had met a “sweet Brit” (namely me). Which worried me a little. After all, if I am a Domme surely I can’t be “sweet”?

But really… I am very secure in my Domme-ness. And I rather like it that Nomicon is intelligent and articulate and talks over lunch and in scenes - if only because when he talks I know what is happening with him. He does have a tendency to drift off into some other space during sessions – so getting him to say anything at all is sometimes a challenge.

And I really do not insist on being addressed as “Mistress” or “Ma’am”. If Nomicon (or anyone else) remembers to do so, that is all well and good, but it is not essential to my view of myself. And in practice, when some slave / submissive / sissy is trussed up with a gag in their mouths, spread open for my inspection and enjoyment, whatever they have to say (if they can say anything at all) is of very little importance.

So while some other Dommes and Masters are clearly very invested in forms of address, and in appearing tough (not “sweet”), I do not pay much attention to that.

In the end, I am in control. End of story.

Ms Emilie